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The Five Love Languages

The Five Love Languages is arguably one of the best love books ever written, in my opinion. I love any kind of a book that will teach me why I and my loved ones do what we do. The more closely I study the behavior of people, the more I want to know. I'm not only fascinated by the infinite variations of humanity in the world, I also love how this kind of information helps us to understand one another on an intensely deep level. This information helps us to connect with and appreciate the people we love. Its deeply healing.

So this Valentine's Day, I thought I'd share an overview of the 5 love languages with you. My husband and I read it during premarital counseling with our Pastor and was a game changer. The premise behind the Five Love Languages is that each person both gives and receives love in one of five ways. Sometimes the way they give love is different from how they receive it. When we don't understand how we give and receive love, as well as how the members of our family do the same, it often results in unmet needs and expectations. After years of neglect, couples can sometimes decide that the connection has been lost, and is irreparable, so they go their separate ways.

My hope is that by reading this, your curiosity will be peaked enough to read the book and begin learning about yourself and your precious family. I hope that marriages will begin the process of transformation, because the information I'll share with you is that powerful. You see, we all believe that the way that we think, act, and react is how everyone else should think, act, and react, yet that kind of belief can be incredibly damaging to a relationship. So open your minds and hearts and let's learn about L-O-V-E.

The five different love languages are as follows:

  1. Words of affirmation

  2. Quality time

  3. Physical Touch

  4. Acts of Service

  5. Gifts

Words of Affirmation: people who give or receive love by affirming loved ones. They constantly say I love you, and need to hear it. They give compliments, and encouraging words. Written and spoken words that uplift are most important to these types.

Quality Time: these types value true presence. They want to have a meaningful conversation with you, using eye contact. This is what makes them feel most loved. Whenever you need them, they are there, and they arent on their phones. They are fully present with you, and to them, you are the center of their world, thus showing you how much they care.

Physical Touch: it's pretty self explanatory, but these types value physical intimacy. They feel most loved when snuggling, having sex, kissing, or holding hands. The physical touch is more than just pleasure. It is a deep sense of love and affection to them.

Acts of Service: these types are the doers. To them, actions speak louder than words. They will do whatever they can to make your life better or easier. Doing things for others represents a deep love for those they care about. Although it may not seem like love to some, the intent behind it is still the same as every other type.

Gifts: We all know these types. They spring out of nowhere with a birthday gift year after year, whether or not you remember their's. To gift- givers, choosing the perfect gift for you is a sign of their true love. If someone receives love this way, they aren't necessarily materialistic, as much as symbolic. To them, the fact that you intentionally chose a gift for them means everything.


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